that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
