I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
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