Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
I just woke up with streamers wrapped around me. Glitter in my hair. My fish are swimming in empty bottles of Barcardi. Helpppp
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
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