So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
her facebook's as public as her vagina
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
Also, new rule: You are no longer allowed to send me a text with the word "dildo" in it before 10am.
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
all my money is vodka money
I have never read a truer sentence.
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize
