Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
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