rhymes with "ouble enetration"
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
It's 11:50 on Friday the 13th. There's a full moon. AND the bride to be just puked on herself while getting a lap dance from a stripper named...wait for it....LUCKY. Is this real life?
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
I wrote a pretty good eulogy, too. Motherfucker pastor had no sense of comedic timing.
I need water and some morals
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
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