what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
My ex's psycho new girlfriend found my vibrator I forgot at his place. Apparently she didn't find it as funny as I did. 😂
Randomize
