yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
When I met you, I was just like "who the fuck is this drunk chick throwing up on my bed?" But I'm glad we're friends now
Randomize
