Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
I made my uber driver take a pit stop between clubs so we could restock on Xanax. #priorities
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
Randomize
