Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
i think i will get a tattoo on my butt that says "im not bluffin with my muffin", but i guess if i was serious, i would get it above my c-section scar
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
Randomize
