WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
Randomize
