ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Randomize
