She's JV to your varsity
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
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