break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
You took a bar mat shot.
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
So drunk me is not subtlety trying to get her boss to cheat on her husband and have a lesbian affair with me. Sober me is ok with that.
Randomize
