KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
Randomize
