so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
Randomize
