I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
