Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
He just brought me a wine glass. Full of Tequila. Ignore any texts after this one.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
Randomize
