mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
Randomize