im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
His hands were made for my vagina.
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
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