he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
Happy hour is for amateurs. Been drunk since 1230. Fell asleep in a disney viewing of UP. Went to the roosevelt and drank more. Now im stumbling around the grove.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested