Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
Randomize