May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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