3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
Sad realization: so long as I use this sleep apnea machine, I will never be the little spoon!
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
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