i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
Randomize
