Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
Randomize
