All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
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I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
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We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
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