We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
I wish you could order shots online.
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
Randomize
