I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
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