And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
It wasn't long before I skipped the martini glass and went straight to drinking from the shaker.
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
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