Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
Randomize