Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
Emergency nipple ring removal:vodka, tweezers, and vodka. Can you bring me a band-aid?
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
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