Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
Turns out that my surprise "happy birthday" drop-in for my dad turned into a "my parents like afternoon sex a lot" realization.
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
