Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Randomize
