You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
Why is "Oprah of drinks" written on my arms?
You said to write it on you, after you kept saying, "You get a drink, you get a drink, everyone gets a drink."
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
Randomize
