awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
It took me years of patience and pilates and yoga and flirting to land that penis. So yeah, I’m going to ride it into the sunset and live orgasmically ever after
Randomize
