is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
Fyi when u order four mini bottles of scotch on a 45 min flight. The flight attendants jaw drops to the floor.
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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