I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
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lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
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Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
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