CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
Liz is crying about burritos again.
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
I need something that says "I'm gay sometimes but I feel scorned by my straight, non-committal lover, so I'm here to get drunk and make out, and possibly end up in a bathroom with someone who's name I won't remember tomorrow"
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
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