I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
Randomize
