I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
Randomize
