I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
Randomize
