the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
If I brought two seashells to Lowe's, do you think that they'd drill two holes in each shell for me? I need to be a mermaid on Saturday...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i think my cat just said my name.
So I stole cocaine from one of my Tinder hookups
And that is the most millennial sentence I've ever said
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
Randomize