Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
So my roomate was sunbathing this morning on the porch with a sock covering his penis
Sounds like a really classy character....
He is classy. It was argyle.
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
Randomize
