Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
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She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
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i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
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