i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
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