i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
Randomize
