My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
Randomize