What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
Enjoy your early 30’s! You’re still young enough to catch a twenty something that can fuck 4 times a day, hot enough to date forty year old penises that can last long enough to give you multiple orgasms
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