erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
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I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
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i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
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