Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
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